things i did today when i wasn’t eating.

12 Apr

Absolutely nothing.

Because I ate all day.

Something really fancy about my job is that you are constantly surrounded by food all day, everyday. I thought I’ve done a top notch job training myself not to snack on typical restaurant traps. These are disturbingly appealing during long shifts even though they’re all pretty nasty.

These are the snacks that I NEVER EVER EVER EVER EVER (fine, almost never) eat:

  1. Maraschino cherries
  2. Tortilla chips
  3. Half-cooked french fries
  4. Carrots for the wings (crudités if you’re fancy)
  5. Someone’s yogurt that they left in the fridge like 7 weeks ago that you have to have to have
  6. Half a stale donut that someone else brought in on Monday and now it’s Friday morning but you just can’t wait until the pm shift comes in with a new goody
  7. Starburst mints (That’s what we call them. they’re the ones that taste like candy canes and leave a film on your tongue for a week)
  8. The gold wrapped pats of butter (don’t judge me.)
  9. Olives *
  10. Coffee with fancy supermarket creamer *

*I’m counting #9 and #10 even though I enjoy neither coffee nor olives. I could eat them out of desperation but I don’t. Therefore they make the list.

As I already mentioned earlier this afternoon, a spectacular platter of cupcakes arrived at the restaurant at about noon. I snapped a photo right before I started working on this post. Here is what the platter looks like now, mostly thanks to me and one of Riley’s almost-two-year-old friends who came to visit me at work:

this was once quite yummy.


I additionally polished off a grilled cheese sandwich with tomato and some super buttery bacon on tomato basil bread. I wish I could attribute the sandwich to Hashbrown Harry’s research, but alas, a grilled cheese sandwich is not a breakfast item unless it has an egg on it, and this particular one did not.

Then for the rest of the day (in between bites of cupcake, of course) I complained about how tight my (once loose) pants are and how big my ass is and how I look 7 months preggers. Fortunately I got a really good new haircut and figured out how to blow it out the right way, so nobody is paying much attention to my expanded frame.

Tomorrow I’ll only eat water. I promise.

Anyway, it’s now 11pm and I’m still at work, and my salad is getting cold and so is Harry’s apple, onion & gorgonzola stuffed pork chop, which he will hopefully share with me. You do understand that because we work late, we restaurant people are entitled to a fourth meal, right? I didn’t make it this way, it’s just how it is….



One Response to “things i did today when i wasn’t eating.”

  1. g April 14, 2012 at 12:02 am #

    Someone judged you about eating olives and flavored coffee but was cool with foiled-wrapped butter?

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